Pillsbury Doughboy dead at 89

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N Fresh died yesterday of a severe YEAST infection.

Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs.Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and the Hostess Twinkies.

The graveside was piled with FLOURS as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the euology, describing Fresh as a man who "neverknew how much he was KNEADED." Fresh ROSE quickly in show business but his later life was filled with many TURNOVERS. He was not considered a very smart COOKIE, wasting much of his DOUGH on HALF-BAKED schemes. Still, even as a CRUSTY old man, he was a ROLL model for millions.

Fresh is survived by his second wife. They have two children and one IN THE OVEN. The funeral was held at 3:25 for 20 minutes.