How can a man tell if a woman has PMS?

  1. She stops reading Glamour and starts reading Guns and Ammo.
  2. She considers chocolate a major FDA food group.
  3. She puts on one of those pads with "wings," then flies off the roof laughing hysterically while riding a broom.
  4. She's developed a new talent for spinning her head around in 360 degree circles.
  5. She retains more water than Lake Superior.
  6. She denies she's in a bad mood as she pops a clip into her semi automatic and "chambers one."
  7. She buys you a new T-shirt, with a bulls-eye on the front...
  8. You ask her to please pass the salt at the dinner table and she says,"All I ever do is give, give, give! AM I SUPPOSED TO DO EVERYTHING?"
  9. She enrolls in the Lizzie Borden School of Charm.
  10. She orders 3 Big Macs, 4 large fries, a bucket of Chicken McNuggets, and then mauls the manager because they're out of Diet Coke.